This Is War
by A-Dream's-Nightmare
Summary: F!Cousland thought she was the last of her line. That is, until she met her twin sister, F!Hawke.
1. Chapter 1

Lothering was like any other small farming village. Until the Blight came, it was. And then it became a pit stop for refugees. More people were flooding in every day, and that did not exclude the last two Grey Wardens of Ferelden. Who, it seemed, were now outlaws accused of murdering their own king and kind.

"Void take it all!" Valiance Cousland swore loudly, cursing Loghain and the bandits that told her she had a price on their head. Trying to apprehend her for that price did not bode well in their favor, as they now lay dead upon the stones. She resisted stabbing the leader's dead body with her dagger, if only to express her anger in some way.

It was bad enough that she couldn't search for her brother, Fergus, lost in the Korcari Wilds as he was. But _now_ she was being accused of betraying her king and country and everything she held dear?

Valiance loved Ferelden. She loved Highever and had one day looked forward to serving her people as a Cousland worthy of the name. When that had gone down in literal ashes (thanks to Arl Rendon Howe) she _needed_ to do _something_ for her country; something to both distract her and give her purpose again. And so she had readily thrown herself into the Grey Wardens, ready to die fighting darkspawn, ready to raise an army against the Blight.

But it appeared Loghain was determined to make that nigh impossible too.

"Tis just a bounty," Morrigan reprimanded her, not understanding how this upset her so much," Just a lie made up to cover his own faults."

Valiance glared heatedly at the Witch of the Wilds, and behind her, Alistair did the same. Morrigan didn't _understand._ All they were, all they had left, was the Grey Warden Order. For Loghain to drag their name through mud…it was like dragging _them_ through the mud. "Shut up, Morrigan," she growled and turned before the witch could sputter out a retort. Smiling with an air of satisfaction, Alistair followed after her.

Just before they actually reached the village of Lothering, they were stopped yet again. Interestingly enough, this time by a refugee couple. "Did I hear right?" the middle aged woman asked," You are Grey Wardens?"

"Er, yes, we are," Alistair responded a bit warily.

Rather than what they expected, the couple sighed in collective relief. But then they began to worry openly. The man explained," We…we were at Ostagar, as merchants, and we know that you did not betray King Cailan."

In response to this, the trio blinked in pleasant surprise, glad that at least two people believed them.

But then the woman cast a worried glance around. "But you should be aware that there are people looking for you. Soldier are everywhere in town, searching for any surviving Grey Wardens."

"No worries," Morrigan brushed it to the side as if unimportant," I'm sure we can get rid of any pesky flies should they bother us."

Though Morrigan was correct, Valiance was hesitant to fight unnecessary battles. "I don't know, Morrigan," she mused, frowning," The refugees here are scared enough as it is, they don't need us going around killing every guard and soldier in town."

Morrigan just scoffed. "You would spare their lives? When they would surely take yours?"

"Pity we can't become invisible and sneak past them," Alistair mumbled, and then inspired by his own though, he looked up at Morrigan," Hey, I don't suppose…" She glared at him which shut him up soon enough.

But it did give Valiance a good idea. "Hey, remember those helmets we lifted off those bandits?"

…

"You two look ridiculous," Morrigan leered at the two Wardens, now adorned with full face helmets that matched their armor, or to the best of their matching talents. They were mismatched helmets that they stole from dead bodies, after all.

"What are you talking about? This is brilliant!" Alistair argued," Now no one knows who we are."

"Of course they still do," she shot back," Everyone knows you're still an idiot."

Alistair growled, but before he could do anything, Valiance tugged on his arm and pulled him away. "No making a scene."

"But she started it!"

"I don't care," she told him, then pointed to the Chantry," Go see if they have a Chanter's Board. We'll need money for supplies." Then she looked at Morrigan," Find out _where_ these soldiers are in town. I'd like to know where to avoid."

Morrigan nodded. "Consider it done."

"I'm going to find a place to sell this extra armor," she lifted their heavy pack," Meet back here."

The two readily agreed and split up. Valiance glanced around, looking for a traveling merchant when she saw one, arguing with a priest of all things. She sighed. Resigned to having break up _another_ fight, she headed over.

…..

Ten minutes later, they met back up. Valiance eventually settled the dispute and sold their extra equipment for about one sovereign. Alistair found some jobs for them to do (killing wolves, bears, and bandits; finding a boy's lost mother; and a few people needed some medicines, traps, and poisons).

"I can't make traps, but I can make some basic poisons," Valiance hummed," Might as well do that first." Alistair checked the posting in his hand," Hmm…He's in the tavern, looks like."

Morrigan shook her head. "That may be a problem." She turned to Valiance," Your soldiers have holed themselves up in the tavern. Also, that is the only place to procure camp supplies."

The Warden groaned," Perfect. Just perfect. Shall we go see if our disguises work?"

They didn't. After speaking to an old farmer about poisons, they literally ran face first into Loghain's soldiers. Alistair did, actually. He began apologizing at first, and then he realized who he ran into and whose mug of ale he spilled all over their armor. Amidst the ensuing shout battle, one of the soldiers recognized their armor. "Hey! That's Grey Warden armor!" he pointed at Alistair noticeable insignia. (Valiance smacked him on the arm; stupid uniform armor!)

The bar fight could not be avoided, but it ended sooner than expected with the help of a stranger named Leliana…

…..

"What if you could redeem yourself by fighting the Blight?" Valiance offered the caged Qunari," Would you accept?" Sten thought about it for a moment before nodding. A smile spread onto Valiance's face; having a Qunari warrior along would be good for their campaign.

"We could talk to the Revered Mother," Leliana suggested," Surely she'll give us the key to his cage."

Valiance agreed. "You and Alistair go get the key. We'll wait here."

"Be right back," Alistair reassured before they left. Behind him, he briefly heard Valiance say something, and then he noticed Barkspawn bound up to his side. The warhound's tail was happily wagging, as he enjoyed spending time with Alistair. "Hey boy." He smiled and reached down to rub the mabari's head. "Let's go sass some Chantry priests." Barkspawn happily barked.

…..

Upon entering the Chantry, the first thing Alistair saw was a group of Templars. He thought back to earlier, when they took out the bandits. Nearly everyone in town _had _been telling them the Knight-Captain was offering a reward… and Valiance said they needed funds. So making sure his helmet hit his identity, he walked over and identified the Knight-Captain armor from the rest. "What'd you want?" the Templar asked, politely if a bit impatient. No doubt he's been dealing with refugees all day and was cranky.

"Umm, well…" Alistair began, but stalled. Dear Maker, how should he word this?

He apparently took too long, as Leliana stepped in. "Hello, Ser." She smiled sweetly (Alistair wasn't sure if she was naturally this smiley or if it was to throw the Templar off guard) and said," This good man has taken care of our little bandit problem on the Imperial Highway."

The Templar seemed impressed and looked at Alistair in a new light. "Is that so? About time, I say. I can't count the number of times we've had to chase them out of the city."

"Ah, it was no problem," Alistair shrugged his shoulders and tried to mimic the cool composure that Valiance had in every situation. He wasn't used to being the center of praise. It must've worked, for the Knight-Captain (what was his name again? Alistair forgot) thanked him one last time, handed him some coin for a reward, and then sent him on his way.

As they walked away, Leliana smiled widely. "There, that wasn't so difficult," she chirped. Alistair was a bit more doubtful. "Let's just hope we can get the key from the Revered Mother as quickly."

As it turned out, getting the key would prove more difficult than as anticipated. When nearing the Mother's office, raised voices could be heard.

"If you will not desist, I will have the Templars bar you from this Chantry," the agitated Mother could be heard.

Then there came a younger, even more agitated female voice. "So not only are you cruel and conniving, but cowardly as well? Oh yes! Why don't you call your beloved Templars and hide behind them while praying to your Maker!"

Leliana sighed and at Alistair's questioning, she answered," One of the more outspoken members of Lothering. She…doesn't agree with the Chantry's teachings."

"You are too cowardly to kill him yourself! And so you'd rather lock him up in a cage, to be ogled and to starve to death!" the woman screeched.

Alistair flinched at the fury in her voice. She wasn't talking about Sten, was she? "But you have to admit," he told Leliana," Isn't it a bit cruel to starve someone to death?" Leliana frowned, though she agreed with him. "Or be taken by the darkspawn," she reminded him that that might come first," No one deserves that, not even a murderer."

Just outside the doors, a Templar stood guard. Leliana greeted him and he greeted her back.

"His fate is in the Maker's hand now," they could hear the Mother say in clipped tones. This only served the anger the woman even more.

" 'In the Maker's hands'? That's a bunch of nugshit and you know it! You play with people's lives like they're nothing more than a game to you! Do you all have this bet going on how he's going to eventually die? What'd you bet? Darkspawn attack for a hundred silver?"

The Templar guard shook his head in exasperation. "She's been harassing us all day," he admitted, gesturing to the closed doors," I'd gladly let you in if only to stop her."

They agreed to talk to the irate woman and the Templar let them in. Almost immediately, Alistair froze in his shock.

"Valiance?"

Valiance, or… a woman looking remarkably like her spun around to face the newcomers. Her eyes landed on Alistair first, then flitted over to Leliana. "Leliana," she greeted, though it didn't sound much like a warm greeting.

Leliana nodded in acknowledgment. "Pleasure to see you again, Miss Hawke."


	2. Chapter 2

As the two woman exchanged pleasantries (if they could even be called that), Alistair stood flabbergasted. Looking at this woman, this…Athene Hawke, he could've sworn this was Valiance Cousland, his fellow Grey Warden. He stared hard at her, his mind supplying the differences, though subtle they were.

Athene seemed a commoner, if one could tell by her plain clothes and plaited hair. He hated to admit it, but she was thinner in the face too. More peaked and life hardened. But then again, Valiance had spent most of her life as the Teyrn's daughter… But just like Valiance, this woman's hair was a stunning silver-white; her eyes were the same ocean blue; _everything_ was the same!

Belatedly, he realized Leliana was talking to the Revered Mother, saying they wanted Sten released into Grey Warden custody to fight the Blight. As Leliana seemed to be persuading more effectively, Valia- (_"Athene!"_ he reminded himself) hung back, watching with crossed arms and a stern expression. (It reminded him vaguely of Sten.)

Eventually, the Revered Mother consented and handed Leliana the key. Almost instantly, Athene demanded the key, saying _she_ would free Sten and she didn't trust them to keep their word. Leliana glanced at Alistair, and seeing his nod, handed it over.

The way Athene spun on her heel and marched out of the Chantry with an air of victory evident in every step, it was almost comical.

….

"Yes, my name really is Athene _Hawke_," she repeated when Alistair asked again if her name wasn't Cousland," No, I've never been to Highever. Why are you asking me all these questions?"

Leliana wondered that herself as Alistair tried to rub his head, only to be stumped by the helmet. In the end, he was too frustrated with the thing and took it off, tucking it under one arm. "Well… it's just you remind me of someone," he admitted," I'm wondering if you're related."

"I doubt it."

"I don't," he mumbled, leading to a question from Athene. As the two conversed, Leliana thought back to everything she knew about Athene. She and her family moved to Lothering some years back, soon after which their father mysteriously died. The family lived on the outskirts of Lothering and remained largely to themselves. But it was no known secret that Athene despised the Chantry and Templars, the reason for which remaining unknown.

As for the Hawke's family history, no one knew.

"Boy are you in for a surprise," Alistair chuckled when they neared the others.

Athene raised an eyebrow in question, but was cut off by Valiance's voice. "_There_ you are, Alistair. Why is your helmet off? You know we-" She was stopped short when she saw Athene. Leliana's well trained eyes saw how her entire body tensed up under her armor and Morrigan had the most unnerving grin.

"Well well, things just got more interesting," the witch laughed.

"Who are you?" Valiance choked out.

The woman in question narrowed her eyes in annoyance and wary. It reminded Leliana distinctly of the face Athene made whenever _anyone_ questioned about the Hawke family. "Why is everyone so interested in who I am?" she demanded.

Leliana looked between them. "Is something the matter?"

"Have you ever heard of the saying?" Alistair asked her," Where everyone has a twin somewhere?"

"What about it?"

And then Valiance tore off her helmet… and Athene saw her identical twin.

…

Leandra Hawke couldn't remember the last time so many people had been in their small home. They never had guests over, for fear of exposure and Athene was usually adept at steering the nosy villagers away. And yet her eldest child came home with a whole band of strangers.

One of which looked just like her.

She set the last roast pheasant on the table for everyone to eat (when was the last time she had to roast _five_ birds?) and split a sixth one for the two mabari hounds. Their own Wolfe shared with the Grey Warden Barkspawn with only a curt command from Athene. "It was always a possibility that Athene may have family out there somewhere," she admitted and watched the group dig in as if they hadn't had a proper meal in a long time. In no time, her son Carver began an eating contest with the male Grey Warden.

Athene sat next to her sister, Bethany, and it became quite clear to everyone that they looked nothing alike. Leandra breathed deeply; she could still remember that day so long ago when Athene joined their family. "When Malcolm brought her home," she continued," We tried to find her family, but we eventually had to give up. There just weren't any clues to her homeland."

Almost as if on cue, both Carver and Bethany looked up in shock. "Wait, are you saying that Athene _isn't_ our sister?" Carver asked, dubious. Beside Bethany, Athene smiled sadly, having always known the truth.

With a heavy sigh, Leandra admitted their dark secret," No. Our Athene was raised in Tevinter as a slave. We didn't adopt her until she was nearly 7."

"Slave?!" Except for that one word, a stone silence fell over the table. There were looks of shock, disgust, disapproval, thoughtfulness, and quiet resign all around.

Having known the truth all her life, Athene took a deep breath and told her tale," It's true. I am from Tevinter. I didn't meet our father, Malcolm, until he traveled through the Free Marches and bought me. "

"If you're a Ferelden, how ever did you end up in Tevinter?" Leliana was appalled.

Athene just shrugged. "I never even thought I could be from somewhere other than Tevinter. I never left the Imperium until I was sold to a Nevarran Grey Warden. After which, Malcolm Hawke found me and I was adopted into the family."

"Wait," Alistair interjected," You're saying the _Grey Wardens's_ partook in _slavery_?" His expression was abound with disbelief and horror.

Athene just shrugged," In northern Thedas, it's common, even among Grey Wardens."

"But if I really _am…_" her blue eyes glanced at Valiance, her… twin sister," a Cousland, it almost makes sense. Slavers always want to find the most profitable 'merchandise'. What's better than a Teyrn's daughter?"

Morrigan agreed," It would also be a blow to the nobles authority; one of their very own children was stolen from right under their nose. I do wondet though why they didn't return for Valiance. Perhaps they didn't know there was a second child?"

It made some sense in some ways, if not in others. But it _did_ raise so many questions.

Valiance, who until now though she was the only remaining Cousland, hung her head and stared at the food on her plate. A sister…she had a sister. A _twin_ sister at that. "Why didn't they ever tell me? Why did _no one_ tell me I had a sister?"

No one said a word; unable to answer a question for someone dead and gone. Why _didn't_ her parents tell her the truth? How _did_ Athene get taken by the Tevinters? Who could answer these questions?

In the end, it was Bethany who spoke," They probably wanted to protect you." Valiance looked up at the youngest Hawke, not understanding. So Bethany elaborated," If they thought they'd never find Athene, then why tell you about a sister you'd never get to meet?"

"Yet here you are," Carver muttered into his cup, then spluttered when Alistair elbowed him," Hey!"

Valiance abruptly stood up. "I need some air," she said and then walked outside.

At first, no one moved. The first to stand up was Alistair, his instinct telling him to go to his Grey Warden sister. But then there was a hand on his shoulder and he turned to see Athene with Valiance's blue eyes. "I'll go talk to her."

…..

The 'Hawke Nest', so lovingly dubbed by the dark haired twins, was situated on the west side of Lothering, so it had a spectacular view of the sun setting over the fields. In the far distance, one could just make out the thin dark line that was the Frostback Mountains.

Valiance stood a few meters from the house, watching the sun set. It was beautiful, she had to admit, and she wondered what it would've been like to grow up here, had she been the stolen babe. How different would life had been, if she was never the Teyrn's daughter, wasn't chosen to be a Grey Warden.

And then she wondered what life as a Tevinter slave might've been like...

She turned her gaze to the south, where the darkspawn horde was surely overrunning Ostagar. Odd that only a few days ago, she had been the new recruit, their King was alive, and she didn't have a family. Despite Alistair's insistence that Grey Wardens _were_ family. Not too true when they're all that's left.

There was only a slight footstep when Athene appeared at her side. Valiance glanced at her sister out of the corner of her eye, but said nothing. Instead, it was Athene who spoke first. "I've been to Highever. Once."

_'And not a single person recognized a girl who looks just like me?'_ Aloud, Valiance asked," What did you think of it?"

Athene thought for only a brief moment before answering," Too many Templars."

Valiance snorted, but couldn't help the slight smile on her face. "One of the most important city's of the Bannorn, and you only notice the Templars?"

"It's the way I was raised," Athene said matter of factly," The way I was trained."

At Valiance's questioning look, she explained," Being a part of this family has been a blessing and a curse. I became an Eldest."

Its meaning was completely lost on Valiance so she asked for an elaboration. "It's an ancient Alamarri-Clayne practice. It's not so common anymore, and nobles don't practice it, but any Ferelden commoner will know."

"When a poor family is in need of protection, but can't afford it, they will choose a child to raise as an Eldest. This child will be trained to protect the family, to detect any possible threat and eliminate it, to keep the family safe above their own needs."

Valiance frowned. _'No wonder it went out of practice,'_ she thought distastefully, not approving the idea at all. It was too barbaric. Why would a family need to do such in the first place? What scared the Hawke's enough to do that to Athene? "Is this supposed to make me feel better?" she snapped at her sister," Hearing that while I grew up in a castle with privilege, my unknown sister was living a life of…of slavery and then servitude!"

Despite Valiance's vehemence, Athene just chuckled. "I just gave you the textbook definition. If you'd let me finish, I'd tell you how Leandra raised me like her own child. Or how I got to travel all over Ferelden and learned new things. Or how I got to be trained in swordsmanship. Or how it taught me to put others before myself, so that I could live with honor."

Slowly, Valiance's anger ebbed away, like the tide of the ocean in the morning. The more part of her life that Athene pointed out that she loved, the less Valiance felt anger at being separated in the first place.

"I _love_ my family here," Athene declared, true in her convictions," I love Bethany. I love Carver. I love Mother. And I loved Father." She turned to her sister and made sure Valiance could see the truth in her face. "No matter what may have happened, or what will happen, I do not regret growing up the way I did."

She then smiled. "And now…I have another sister."

Valiance smiled back. "Yeah. I _twin_ sister." They both chuckled a little over that.

"Ahem." Someone coughed and both turned to see Alistair standing awkwardly in the doorway. His eyes darted to Valiance and it was obvious he wished to speak with her. Athene understood the message and clapped a hand on her sister's shoulder. "Stay out here as long as you need. Tonight, all of you can stay here and tomorrow I'll help you get whatever supplies you need." Then as she walked past Alistair, she gave him a friendly shove in Valiance's direction.

Once he regained his balance, Alistair took the last few steps to Valiance's side. He looked at her for a moment, he saw the way the fading sunlight reflected off her skin and hair, and the calm almost peaceful look on her face. This was the first time he had ever seen her as such, and he found that he liked it very much.

"How do you feel?" he ventured.

Valiance took a breath, but held it. She originally was going to say 'tired', 'overwhelmed', or 'like nugshit' and she realized that this morning, all of those were true. But now she suddenly realized she didn't feel like those things anymore. "Better," she let a deep breath out and it was like letting out all her pent up frustrations. Her parents, Fergus and his family, Ostagar, Howe and Loghain, the Blight; it was like suddenly she _could_ handle it all. Like it wasn't such a burden.

_'I wonder if it's a twin thing.'_

Alistair seemed to understand how she felt and she wondered if it was a Grey Warden thing. He smiled at her. "I'm glad," he said, and barely resisted the urge to ramble like he always did," And look on the bright side. Now you have a sister."

Valiance smiled. "I have a sister."

…

When Athene reentered the Nest, the chaos was slowly dwindling down. Leliana had helpfully assisted Bethany and Leandra clear off the table. The mabaris laid happy and sated by the fire. Sten stood near them, an unknown expression on his face. Athene knew his history and what he had done, but trusted he wouldn't be able to do much of anything with a house full of fighters. As Leliana chatted with the Hawke women, Morrigan contented herself with just watching.

Carver had hopped himself over to the plush armchair, and his injured leg was propped up. Athene thought wistfully to when a Hurlock smashed the dull side of an axe across Carver's shin and knee, shattering the bone. Getting him out of Ostagar had been the easy part with Athene's training and experience. Dragging him home had been another thing. Bethany had healed him to the best of her ability, but with her limited knowledge and the time it took to get home, he would be invalid for at least a week.

And he would always limp.

Athene went to go sit by him. "Did you mean what you said?" he asked immediately. Half of Athene groaned (_more _interrogation) and the other half was comforted by the normalcy (Good old Carver).

Not understanding what he meant though, she answered vaguely," I say a lot of things."

He punched her in the arm. "Smart ass," he grumbled," What you said outside, about being an Eldest and stuff. That you don't regret being my sister."

It took Athene a moment to comprehend what he just said. Then…"You ass! You were eavesdropping?"

"Oh please, you were right next to the house." He brushed it off. "Not very private, if you ask me. But you didn't answer my question."

"Yes, I meant every word."

It caught him off guard, as if a part of him had expected her to say no. Just like that, any harsh words he was going to say, any callous remarks he was so known for, all fell away. "It feels stupid now."

"What does?"

"Our rivalry. I always hated that _you_ were the protector of this family. You always did everything so perfect, and it was like you were casting this shadow that I couldn't get out of."

"I wanted so bad to be _better_ than you. But now that I know…you didn't really have a choice, did you?"

Athene sighed," It was my duty, Carver. But I did not run away from it. I chose to embrace it and did my best to keep you and this family safe."

A slight shuffle caught Athene's attention and she glanced up. The Qunari giant had shuffled his feet, resting his weight from one leg to the other. But the most unnerving thing was his attention was fixated on her. His gaze was thoughtful and, dare she think it, approving?

"But still," Carver regained her attention," I must've made you _miserable_, and I shouldn't have."

"Oh ho!" she hooted, smiling," Is that an apology from the mighty and manly Carver?"

"Sod off," he glared at her.

…..

The Hawke Nest didn't have any guest rooms, but the travelers were content to hunker down in the living room with blankets. Alistair was more than happy to finally get out of his heavy armor, and even borrowed some polish. He and Valiance sat beside each other as he told her about the Grey Wardens.

Athene Hawke stood halfway in the doorway of her room, watching the dynamics of the odd group of people. Having been secluded to her tight knit family, never before had she interacted with such characters, nor so various. She hoped the shadows hid her well enough and she plain enough to go unnoticed. It was doubtful they would take to being watched so closely very well. Though she thought Morrigan probably knew; as of yet, the witch had glanced in Athene's direction twice. But she had yet to say anything opposed to Athene's watchfulness.

So Athene silently saw the two Wardens interact like old friends, like being in each other's company was the most natural thing. A fair number of times, Alistair succeeded in making Valiance laugh; a feat considering everything she's been through.

Leliana was silent and thoughtful, sitting by the fire. Her eye watched the flames dance and spark, and absentmindedly her hand reached out to rub Barkspawn's ear. Athene wondered what the Lay sister was thinking, but also wondered herself _why_ Leliana was so ready to leave with these people. As far as Athene knew, Leliana had been a part of Lothering's Chantry for two years. But then again, how many people knew the red-head was an expert archer? Why was she so ready to just up and leave?

Then Athene's gaze switched to Sten's direction. The giant of a man was content with sitting on the floor, sharpening the great sword the Hawkes had given him. He had no weapon of his own, and Athene saw no reason to hold onto her old sword. Despite Athene's worries of his history, all of that was quieted by her mabari, Wolfe. The fierce and somewhat distrusting war hound had decided to make a friend in the Qunari. Right now, the mabari laid himself at Sten's feet, something both man and dog were content with.

Tomorrow, this ragtag group would leave, to go find an army. Athene would probably never see her twin sister again. The Hawke's had already made plans to leave Lothering as soon as Carver's leg healed. They might even leave Ferelden altogether.

It just seemed so cruel for her and Valiance to finally meet, only to never see each other again. For this reason, Athene refrained from telling anyone.

_'Best to let them leave tomorrow with hope and let them find out on their own,'_ she reasoned.

…..


	3. Chapter 3

"And I've packed some dried beef for you to snack on the road," Leandra bustled around, throwing things she thought the travelers might need into a spare pack. Let it not be said that Leandra Hawke wasn't a mother hen. Valiance humored the older woman and no one said anything while Leandra fretted over them. It might be the last time someone did so until this Blight ended.

"So off to Redcliffe then?" Morrigan reaffirmed after Valiance's decision that morning. The decision had been final when Alistair ran into a knight from Redcliffe. Turns out, Arl Eamon was gravely ill and his knights were on a quest for the Urn of Sacred Ashes.

"It should take about three to four days," Valiance announced, then frowned," Provided everything goes smoothly."

"Doubtful," Sten said with his usual grim faced frown.

Alistair groaned while tying his pack shut; everyone knew Sten was right. The question now was how many darkspawn attacks they would suffer. "Right, a week at least then," he said cheerfully and swung the pack over his armored shoulder.

Athene approached her sister one last time, a bittersweet smile on her face. "You keep safe," she admonished," No getting yourself killed." Valiance's returning smile was wry. "You too. Don't you dare die."

"Wouldn't dream of it."

"Are we quite ready?" Morrigan's voice could be heard outside, where she and Sten were waiting. Alistair and Leliana stood just by the door, waiting patiently for Valiance. There was a peculiar look on Alistair's face as he regarded the twin sisters.

"Well…"Valiance shuffled her feet, not sure how to quite say it. Hell, when was the last time she got to say goodbye to _anyone_ that wasn't in a life or death situation? Much less to her own sister, whom she met yesterday. Maker! How do people _do_ this on a regular basis? Awkward, was all she could think of.

"Goodbye, sister," Athene was the one to say it in the end.

"Yeah…" Valiance bit her lip. "Good…goodbye, sister." Maker, she hated goodbyes! Unable to handle the tension anymore, she turned away and didn't look back, fully expecting to return in the future and see her sister again.

Only Athene knew it would probably never come to be. When the door shut behind them, she dropped to her knees.

…..

The small but growing party walked along; the silence only broken by a brief interlude saving a merchant dwarf and his son. Bodhan Feddic and Sandal were pleasant enough to talk to and so good natured too, but Valiance's mind was a million miles away. Alistair had asked her if she wanted to talk, but she declined.

Eventually, Morrigan commented," You know, I'm surprised the Hawke didn't come with us. She seemed a capable enough warrior, if the stories she told us are to be true."

Alistair shot a glare at the witch when he noticed his fellow Warden's shoulders tensed at the mention of her sister. "Really, Morrigan?" he bit out frustratingly.

Sten added," It was her duty to remain and protect her people."

"And she did _such_ a good job of it too," Leliana piped up, meaning it with complete honesty," Who would've guessed that Bethany and their father were apostates? For ten years they lived there and no one ever realized."

"It's her training," Valiance murmured quietly, but everyone heard her," She was trained specifically to hide from and fight Templars."

Alistair was intrigued. "Really now? That's unique."

Just then, Barkspawn stopped in the middle of the highway. He cocked his head to the side briefly, listening before turning around. "Barkspawn?" Valiance questioned," What is it boy?" He woofed again.

There came an answering bark in the distance. "What?" Valiance glanced up, surprised. A moment later, a large mabari hound, darker in color than Barkspawn, came bounding around the corner. And behind him…

"Wait!" Athene shouted, running as fast as she could with a heavy pack on her shoulder and her claymore on her back. She was dressed in the tunic and pants she was wearing this morning, but by the clanking in the sack they could tell she brought her armor.

"Hawke?" Alistair's head tilted to the side, watching as the other twin ran up to meet them. To her credit, she wasn't even out of breath upon reaching them. But she did have a huge smile on her face.

"What are you doing here?" Valiance asked," What about your family? Your duties as an Eldest, you have to-"

She was thrown off balance when Athene just smiled. "My duties as an Eldest dictate that I protect my family, my charges." Her smile grew wider. "That includes my sister about to go rushing into a Blight."

….


	4. Chapter 4

"Wait…" Alistair looked around the camp as they started to set up," Something's not right here." Everyone paused in their chores to glance up at the would've been Templar. Silently, Alistair made a mental checklist of their camp: six people, two mabari hounds, one giant bonfire, and… "Why do we only have three tents?" he asked, counting the two already raised and the third being raised by Valiance and Leliana.

From beside the bonfire, Athene looked up. "They're big enough tents," she said simply. "Don't worry, Alistair. We'll all fit."

Alistair turned red in the face; from embarrassment or shyness, they couldn't be sure. "You want us all to _share_?" he stammered," Sleeping together?" If possible, his face turned redder. "Er, I mean…in the same tent? But who would…share? How would it be split up?"

The answering shrugs the ladies gave him did not make him feel better. Morrigan however, did not share in their eagerness to share sleeping quarters. "Like I would sleep anywhere near you, imbecile," she scoffed at him and pointedly began walking towards the far edge of the clearing. She called out behind her, not bothering to glance back and just waved her hand," I have my own shelter. You five figure it out yourselves."

Alistair stuck his tongue out at her receding back. "Sure, why not stay behind and help us?" he muttered sarcastically. But back to the matter at hand…

"Don't worry, Alistair," Valiance rose and smiled at him. She wiped any residual dust from her hands. "We won't traumatize your poor little virgin mind and make you sleep in the same tent as a woman."

"Hey!" he protested, then pouted cutely," There's an insult in there somewhere, isn't there?"

"But the tents can only fit about two people and their belongings," she mused, glancing back at the tents and judging their size," How shall we divide them up?"

"Hmm," Leliana hummed thoughtfully, then getting an idea she crouched down and drew three circled in the dirt. Curious as to what she was doing, the others gathered around her. With her finger, she drew a B next to one circle. "This will be the boys' circle," she said, adding an A for Alistair and an S for Sten in the aforementioned circle. The next circles, she put G's next to them. "And we split these between us three girls," she finished proudly.

"Wait. Wait. Wait," Alistair shook his head and waved his arms about," I have to share a tent with _Sten_?" He fell deadly silent and pale; staring at the Qunari standing not ten feet away. Before now, no one really bothered the giant of a man, and he was content to stand by the fire, idly watching Athene build up the flames.

"But he's…he's…" Alistair whispered dramatically to the girls, not quite wanting to say 'murderer' for fear of Sten hearing and becoming offended.

"I got this," Athene suddenly stood up and addressed the Qunari," Sten, if you share a tent with Alistair, do you promise not to squish him in his sleep?"

"What are you _doing_?!" Alistair might've had a slight heart attack…

Sten just stared at her, his usual grim expression on his face, and didn't utter a single word. Slowly, she sat back down. "Okay," she hummed, as if she hadn't just confronted a killer," Let's _not_ put him in the same tent as Alistair. How about…this?" She quickly erased the circles and drew three new ones. "Alistair with his own tent, Valiance and Leliana will have the other, and I'll brave a tent with our Qunari friend."

"What?" All three of them gasped. "What if he kills you in your sleep?" Alistair added worriedly.

Athene gave him a dubious look. "He won't have the chance with Wolfe in the same tent," she told him," He'll stay up all night, keeping an eye on Sten. And that way, the rest of you don't have to worry about him attacking at night."

All four turned their heads to the dark brown mabari sitting silently by a log. Beside him, Barkspawn dug furiously in the dirt. Upon noticing all the stares directed his way, Wolfe tipped his head to the side, but otherwise didn't move.

"Has he even moved since we set up camp?" Leliana asked. She remembered Athene telling the mabari to 'sit' upon their stopping, and she couldn't remember the hound moving since.

"Good boy, Wolfe," Athene praised the mabari, who let out a quiet bark in acknowledgement. She smiled lovingly at the dog, and raising her hand, ordered," Go hunt, boy. See what you can find." Instantly the dog leapt to his feet and bounded off into the brush.

Athene turned back to the others, and froze when she saw them all staring at her with wide eyes. "What?"

"How can he even _do_ that?" Leliana asked.

"That's just creepy and unnatural," Alistair declared.

Valiance laughed at their reactions; she knew first hand that well trained mabari's could sit still for hours at the command of their owners. "Will he be alright?" she asked Athene," Aren't you worried he might run into darkspawn?"

Her twin shook her head. "I'm more worried he might get the idea to bring a dead darkspawn back for dinner," she laughed," Hopefully, he'll be back soon with some rabbits." She looked up, hopeful. "Can anyone cook here?"

Blank stares were her answer.

…"Great."

…

Three days later, they were only halfway to Redcliffe, and Valiance was worried about the duration. In normal circumstances, they should've been in Redcliffe by now. Their premonition in Lothering, that they'd be delayed by darkspawn attacks, came true. Truly, they spent half their time battling parties of darkspawn. They were lucky they hadn't come near remarkably large amounts, but the increasing frequency of attacks were beginning to become alarming.

Valiance knew for a fact that Athene was starting to worry more and more for her family back in Lothering. When asked about it, she'd just walk away and not speak to anyone.

Morrigan and Sten continued to remain aloof from the rest of the party. Valiance tried multiple times to talk to Morrigan, and so far the only thing she could pry out of the witch was information about the Korcari Wilds. While she learned a lot, it did not feel like she was getting any closer to the woman. As for Sten, the only person who could get him to talk was Athene, and that was only because she knew to keep their conversations short and to the point. Any lengthy interrogations and he'd soon grow annoyed.

And then there was Alistair… The death of Duncan and the rest of the Grey Wardens still hung heavily on the young man's shoulders. Valiance knew he felt closer to the Grey Wardens than she ever could have; she never even had the chance to meet them.

He spoke of them often, telling her stories of his fellow Grey Wardens. She especially loved when he told her how he first discovered that the Joining increased one's appetite; she laughed just like the other Warden's had at his ravenous eating. She still chuckled every now and then, imagining in her head Alistair sneaking down to the larder at night for a 'late night snack' and ending up eating half the food.

Then there'd be nights when he would speak of Duncan, and his entire demeanor would change. And just like that, the entire mood of their conversation fell.

While Valiance still greatly missed her family, and the hole they left still felt like it was bleeding, she never once mentioned them to Alistair. In fact, she didn't even know if Duncan ever told him what happened to the Cousland family.

But what scared her the most was the future.

_'Maker, how will I do this?'_ she wondered late at night, staring at the fire and letting her mind wander. All these people, dear Maker, all these _misfits_, were hers to lead. And to fight a Blight! She and Alistair had set out to build an army, but she never expected that so many individuals would chose to follow her. When she, Alistair, Morrigan and Barkspawn entered Lothering, she never expected to leave with four additions to their party.

Honestly, she was terrified at the thought of leading all of them.

"Copper for your thoughts?" Alistair asked, sitting down beside her. Startled, Valiance gazed up at him; she thought no one would bother sitting by her tonight. Then his words registered in her mind. "It's just…so much is happening so fast."

She gestured to the whole of the camp, to the four people, two dogs, and now a pair of dwarven merchants. "Last week, I wasn't responsible for all these people. A week ago I wasn't trying to raise an army. A week ago, it was just-"

"Me and you?" he finished.

Valiance stuttered to a stop; had he read her thoughts? No, she shook her head of the notion, Alistair wasn't _that_ insightful. He continued speaking while playing with the stew in his bowl, pushing it around with his spoon. "I know it sounds stupid," he mumbled, and Valiance noticed that he wouldn't look up at her," But I miss when it was just me and you."

She felt a smile spread on her face. It was…sweet, knowing that he felt the same way she did. Ever since that morning she woke up at Flemeth's hut, despite all the hardships they faced, she still had Alistair. The moment she stepped out of the hut, he crushed her in his arms, folding her in a tight embrace and telling her how happy he was she was alive. She had lost so much, had been through so much, but she still had Alistair. It was more than his warm personality; it was who he was. Alistair was a Grey Warden, the last one beside her. No matter what, he would be there by her side; he was the only one she could relate to. As a Grey Warden, she felt safe enough to talk to him about her nightmares and her worries.

Alistair _understood._

At that moment, Barkspawn barked at Wolfe, trying to engage the bigger and older mabari into play. Valiance and Alistair turned to watch the interaction, as did the others. Barkspawn continued to bark and pounce around Wolfe, but despite his attempts, the other dog didn't budge.

Alistair frowned at Wolfe. The differences between the two dogs was astounding, both in looks and behavior. Wolfe was much bigger and obviously older, with graying fur around his muzzle. His fur was originally dark brown, almost black, where Barkspawn was a nice light tan. He was also a statue; never once did he move unless it was on Athene's command.

"Have I even mentioned how creepy that is?" Alistair shuddered when Wolfe just sat there. It wasn't until Athene said," Go play," did he bound off with Barkspawn. The change from mabari shaped statue to playing, yipping dog was instant.

Valiance hummed. "They're both very…" she tried to think of a fitting term," –disciplined." She then shrugged," Baer was the same. He was more trained and was as disciplined as Wolfe."

Alistair looked at her strange. "Baer?"

Unknown to Alistair, Valiance had a mabari hound before Ostagar. Unfortunately, he never made it out of the castle. As far as Alistair knew, as far as anyone knew, Barkspawn was the mabari they helped and rescued from the darkspawn. He was also their joint mabari, as he had imprinted on both of them. Of course, Alistair had been the one to name him 'Barkspawn'…

She shook her head, not ready to relive that dark night. "I'll tell you someday," she promised.

As if she was a gift from the Maker, Leliana called out," Who wants seconds?" Valiance giggled when Alistair jumped up, his Grey Warden stomach always hungry for more food. When he returned with a bowl of new food and a big smile, the mention of Baer all forgotten, she couldn't help but tease him," I think even for a Grey Warden, you're a glutton. I bet you ate and ate and _ate_ before you Joined."

"Hey!" he protested, but it didn't have as much effect when his mouth was full of food.

"It's true," she taunted," I'm a Grey Warden, and I don't eat nearly as much as you."

"Really?" he grinned and poked her in the side," Because I was watching you wolf down food the other day, and I thought 'Oh, it's a good thing she gets a lot of exercise'."

Valiance turned red in the face and Alistair realized too late that he might've said the wrong thing. "Are you calling me a pig?" she growled and punched him in the bare arm.

"Sorry, sorry!" he apologized and held hands in front of him to block her," Please don't hit me! I bruise easily!"

Just like that, her anger instantly turned into mirth and she fell into a fit of laughter. A big, mighty warrior who could throw a heavy shield around like paper, 'bruises easily'? It was just too funny.

"How ever did you become a Grey Warden?"

He responded with his trademark roguish grin. "Same way you did. You drink some blood, you choke on it, and pass out. You haven't forgotten already, have you?"

She giggled," Very funny."

After swallowing another bite of food, he grinned. "I do my best." Figuring it was best to just get it out of the way, he dived right in. "I was actually from the Chantry, training to be a Templar, which I already told you, haven't I? Anyways, Duncan recruited me before I took my vows."

He laughed, amused by the memory. "Oh, you should've seen the Grand Cleric, she was _furious_. In the end, Duncan had to conscript me." He chuckled; he could still remember face and how red it got. The entire situation had been funny, really. His Templar mentors had been more than ready to be rid of him, but the Grand Cleric had made such a _fuss_. He almost expected her to call for Duncan's execution

Apparently, Valiance agreed with him. "She didn't to lose you? Why?"

"I have no idea," he said honestly," It's not like I would've made a good Templar. I spent more time in the kitchens than I did in class."

"Told you you're a glutton," she giggled under her breath, but he didn't hear her.

"I think she just didn't want to give anything to the Grey Wardens. You see, the Chantry usually holds tight to its Templars. Can't have anyone giving away trade secrets."

As a rogue, the words 'secret', 'classified', or 'need to know' had always been a magnet to Valiance. She couldn't help it; she was always seeking out new knowledge, new things to learn. Trade secrets were _always_ the best.

"Ooh, 'trade secrets'?" her eyes glimmered as she inched just a little closer to him," So there's more to Templars than big armor and helmets?"

Alistair laughed a little at her eagerness. He had seen a glimpse of that curiosity back at Ostagar, when she ran around talking to everyone and sticking her nose into everything. He had followed after her then, not really having anything better to do, but it had been so much fun just watching her. (He hadn't even said anything when she lifted 3 silvers off a Chantry priest) But he hadn't seen that curiosity since.

So what else could he do but smile and oblige? "Well, the Chantry would have you believe that Templars are just enforcers and glorified guards, but really, they're an army…"

…

"So, Sten…let's talk." To Sten, the one known as Athene Hawke seemed far too energetic for one about to go to bed. There was a wry smile on her face as she laid stomach down on her bedding, her chin nestled in her hands. "What's Seheron like? Or are you from Par Vollen?"

He frowned at the curious human. "Is this a trait common among your people? Or among twins?"

"What do you mean?"

To Athene, it was almost comical how he both scowled and frowned at the same time, like an adult fed up with a child. He was a veritable giant, and sometimes when she stood by him, she certainly felt like a child. Of course, he treated everyone like a small child too.

"The Warden is full of questions, as well," he grumbled, shifting to sit better cross-legged on his own bedroll," She asked many pointless inquiries."

She hummed; he was just being grumpy. It was sweet, almost. He reminded her a great deal of Carver, only that he was a quiet sort of grumpy. "It's much warmer than here in Ferelden," she mused softly, a distant look in her eyes," You must hate the cold here."

Sten nodded. "And smells of wet dogs."

She laughed lightly, but he could tell she had drifted back to wherever her mind had gone. "You'll eventually get used to it," she reassured him.

"You must miss it," she murmured.

It was true and Sten would not lie about it. This land was so strange to him and its people and customs baffled him. As he told her such, she listened quietly. At her knowing little smiles, he got the impression that she knew exactly what he meant.

"I miss the smells of Seheron," he finished. Speaking of his home brought back so many memories, and if he would just close his eyes he could almost pretend he was there. "Tea and incense and the sea. Ferelden smells of wet dogs."

She smiled at that. "Ferelden smells of freedom."

He begged to differ. "Perhaps your sense of smell is damaged." She laughed even louder at that and rolled over onto her back. Her hands folded neatly on her stomach and she stared up at the ceiling of their tent. She stared at it like it was the night sky.

"Of all the lands I've been to, Ferelden is my favorite. It may be the land of barbarians, but freedom is in every corner. So much open space, room to run and not worry about confines and cages. Anyone can be who they want to be, no one else can force you to be something you're not. If you want, you can be a merchant," she laughed," You could be a terrible merchant, but a merchant none-the-less."

"And best of all: there's nothing a Ferelden hates more than slavery."

Sten knew enough of Athene to know that that last line was quite significant. Her past as a slave to the Tevinter Imperium was common knowledge among their group. Yet as far as Sten knew, that had been years ago. He knew that her past largely defined her, but he couldn't understand how it haunted her so. _'The past is in the past; leave it there,'_ he once said to her on the road. All she said in return was,_' I'll let go of the past when it lets go of me.'_

He was unwilling to bring that conversation up again, so instead he narrowed on all the other things she said. "Everything you have just said is nonsense."

She laughed, all of her surface worries gone. "You'll learn, Sten, you'll learn."

…..

"It seems there is to be civil war after all. Pity," Howe finished reporting, though to Zevran, he _hardly_ seemed upset about it. But he wasn't here to form opinions on his employer.

The Regent, Loghain, did not say anything to Howe's report, so the Teryn continued. "And to make matters worse, it appears a couple Grey Wardens have survived Ostagar. They will no doubt move against you. So," he waved Zevran forward," I have arranged for a solution…with your leave."

"The Antivan Crows send their regards." The greeting fell from his lips as easily as it had thousands of times before. It was just a formality, and really it was a rare occurrence that an employer actually met with the Crow he hired.

As the Regent eyed him distastefully with a curt," An assassin?" he realized that Howe hadn't informed him. Howe didn't even bat an eyelash," They have already declared a threat against you, my lord, and are proving to be quite troublesome. We will require the best to…take care of them."

"_And _the most expensive."

…"Just get it done."

…

"There are only two remaining Grey Wardens as far as we can tell," Howe was saying, though Zevran was barely paying attention," They are the two that were not part of the main force that led our good King Cailan to his death. They diverted Loghain's force from joining the battle."

Honestly, Zevran couldn't care less. He had rather hoped he wouldn't even have to talk with the man more than necessary. He thought himself above all others, and acted like a snake; Zevran _hated_ snakes. Howe had a massive ego to fill, and it was obvious in the way he ordered everyone around like slaves; he even talked to _him_, Zevran Arainai, like a child!

It was all rather insulting, and if Zevran bothered to care more, he would probably retaliate in some way or other.

"They arrived in Lothering a few days ago, and will no doubt head straight for Redcliffe-"

_'Because their only political ally is there,'_ Zevran thought snidely,_' No need to tell me something I don't already know.'_

"The man, Alistair, was the apprentice of the former Warden Commander," Howe continued, completely unaware of Zevran's ignorance," He's not much, but he has the means to hinder Loghain's plans.

"Your real trouble will be his companion, Valiance Cousland." The woman's name both surprised and intrigued Zevran. A female Grey Warden? He did not know the fabled Wardens accepted female recruits.

Howe explained why she was more of a threat than the man, Alistair. "Though she's the newest Warden recruit, she was the daughter of the traitor, Bryce Cousland. She was trained to lead war parties."

At that moment, Howe paused at a certain painting. Zevran hadn't noticed it before, but the hallway they were walking down was lined with portrait after portrait. Paintings of the noble families of Ferelden, both present and past. This particular painting depicted a family of four, obviously high in status based upon the quality of art and posh clothing. The patriarch was tall with graying hair, and his wife showed similar qualities. Their two children were vastly differed in age; the oldest being a son with dark hair. The next painting down the line showed the very same man with a wife and young son.

Then there was the daughter. Valiance Cousland.

_'She's very pretty,'_ he thought, noting her strangely white hair and her blue eyes. She held more of her mother's features than her father's. More often than not, she was probably deemed quite beautiful. But in this instance, those unique looks would work against her. He could easily locate her. People would remember seeing one such as her.

"We'll leave tonight," he said out loud.

….


End file.
